Like most children, I grew up hearing the story of the three bears. You might be familiar with it. In adult terms, it’s about a teenage thief who fancies herself a taste-testing vandal who breaks into the wrong house. But through the eyes of a child, it’s a sweet story about a young girl who makes her way into an empty home finding three bowls of porridge. She tastes all three discovering that one is too hot, one is too cold and one is “juuuust right.” I can’t really remember the moral of the story.

In thinking about the Fall season—in which my particular city wakes up after a long slumbering summer—this story has more relevance than ever. August and September is a signal for those who are potential church folk to begin visiting local churches in hopes of finding the one that is “juuuust right.”

For those who are visiting churches, know someone visiting churches or are simply interested in these kinds of conversations, I have created my own Goldilocks Grid for finding the right church this Fall. Here goes . . .

Too Hot

I’m wary of churches that are too hot. Churches wrapped in hype, smoke machines, and soundbites make me nervous. For clarity, do not confuse “too hot” with “too big”. Just because a church is large doesn’t necessarily mean it has sold out to cultural Christianity. Simply put, beware of churches that make too many promises for your problems. Our suffering—whether by our own hand, others or simply the brokenness of the world—can only be mitigated through the beauty of Jesus. He has got to be enough to take us through the storms of life.

Too hot often feels overproduced, too slick. It has an aftertaste that makes you wonder, “Was that real?” Churches that are too hot are almost impossible to reproduce in our own lives.

Too Cold

Cold churches are dangerous because they have clean lines, well-defined structures but they are often graveyards for the spiritually hungry. They look good, but the hearts of the leaders have grown cold to grace and have settled for rules—lots and lots of rules. For clarity, cold churches are not necessarily old or small churches. I have experienced large churches that are cold and lifeless and small churches that are white-hot for God’s glory.

Too cold often means a church that is afraid of risk or getting involved in the community. These churches love the culture wars or worship wars or literal wars. These are well-meaning places of worship that have forgotten why they exist.

Juuuust Right

Just right churches are serious about Jesus, but not too serious about themselves. They are serious about structure, but not for structure’s sake. They are thinking about longevity and effectiveness for tomorrow. Just right churches create space for the person far away from God, but unashamedly say Jesus is the source of all life and salvation.

This isn’t always true, but I’ve found just right churches are sometimes a little messy, slow-growing and awkward. These kinds of churches are satisfied to live in the background and see change one life at a time.

There are plenty of just right churches in our city and around the country. When searching for a church, take some time, a heavy dose of godly wisdom, and ask yourself the question, “Would Goldilocks go to this church?”