I don’t really do New Year’s resolutions. I used to. But I’ve discovered that to make a list and then to promptly lose said list does not bode well for accomplishing the list. I gave up on resolutions around the turn of the century when I realized I had paid for an entire year of a gym membership and hadn’t gone once. Lists are not usually good for my soul anyway. I don’t like being driven by duty or guilt. That being said, I do appreciate anyone who can create a list and then work that list and create healthy personal change. Jonathan Edwards (perhaps the greatest American theologian) created 70 resolutions that he read out loud to himself once a week.  They’re beautiful and staggering. My resolutions always come out sounding trite and self-serving. Something along the lines of This year I will get rid of the belly fat.  Edwards’ resolutions, however, are much more profound.  My three favorites of Edwards are:

#5 Resolved, never to lose one moment of time.

#7 Resolved, never to do anything, which I should be afraid to do if it were the last hour of my life.

#17 Resolved, that I will live so as I shall wish I had done when I come to die.

Edwards was serious about making the most of his life. I have a feeling that if Netflix were available in 1900, Edwards wouldn’t have subscribed. He felt the weight of the temporariness of his existence. One of his resolutions (#9) is the commitment to think about his own death at least once per day. Is this because he had an unhealthy relationship with death? I don’t think so. I think he was hyperaware that death was coming and he didn’t want to waste a single second of life on chaff.

Ruth Haley Barton, in her book Sacred Rhythms, tells a story about accidentally discovering her best self—her most fully aware, fully-engaged self. I won’t give it away (maybe you’ll read the book) but at the end of her day, she comments how the kind of person she was that day is who she is meant to be every day. That got me thinking, What kind of person do I want to be in 2018? This is certainly not a lead up to a Your Best Life Now encouragement. I don’t subscribe to self-actualization and a twisted Osteen worldview. However, there is something to be said for choosing the kind of person you want to be—the kind that is most fully alive, fully engaged, and fully awake. The kind of person who “never loses one moment of time” or resolves to not be afraid as “if it were the last hour of my life.”

I’m working through what this looks like—how to live fully alive.  I know the substance of this quest will most definitely fall into 5 categories:

Faith: I want to enjoy God more this year. Enjoy his presence. Enjoy his Word. I am most alive when I am walking intimately with him.

Family: Those moments when we’re all getting along and the kids aren’t at each other’s throats—I want to notice those times and appreciate the active grace of God embedded into our relationships.

Friendships: I want to drink more wine and eat more sushi with people that I care about deeply—people that really see me and love me. We’ve had this seasonally and it’s increasingly hard to cultivate. But I am most alive and engaged when I’m in deep relationship with people.

Time: Less time on my device. More time walking and praying. Less time watching T.V.  More time listening to my kids and wife and God. Less time worrying about my future and more time resting in Grace.

Pastoring: I am most alive when I look people in the eye, not as they sit in rows. I am most alive in the waiting rooms with them, not waiting for them to show up on a Sunday. I am good at preaching, but I want to be great at loving people. I’m most alive and most like Jesus when I do this.

Do you have any resolutions you’re making this year? I’d love to hear them!